“The Everlasting Reminiscence” is nominated for an Academy Award for Greatest Documentary Characteristic Movie this yr. The movie tells the story of a Chilean couple — journalist Augusto Góngora and actress Paulina Urrutia — whose two-decade marriage prevails when Augusto is identified with Alzheimer’s illness. We spoke with Paulina about documenting her love story and life with Augusto, who died of Alzheimer’s illness in 2023. A particular on-line screening of “The Everlasting Reminiscence” is going down on Feb. 22. The screening shall be adopted by a Q&A with director Maite Alberdi and Alzheimer’s Affiliation Celeb Champion Tony Hawk.
Paulina, how did you and Augusto first meet?
We met in 1996. Augusto got here to the theater of the play I used to be appearing in. He knew the director and he needed to satisfy me. I couldn’t consider it. When he informed me it was true, I stated, “Oh, how ridiculous!” The following day, he known as my colleague to ask for my telephone quantity. And the subsequent day he known as me on the telephone. That’s the way it started.
You and Augusto have been collectively for greater than 25 years. What have been a few of the first indicators or signs that you just observed in Augusto?
He was completely energetic. He had a job, was creating a brand new venture for Chilean public tv, the place he was a member of the board of administrators. The very first thing that started to fail was his capability to retain issues.
He can be planning conferences or duties that he needed to do the subsequent day, and would get to work and say, “Hey, we have got the assembly,” however then ask what the assembly was about, or in the event that they already had the assembly.
One other instance was when he was instructing on the College. He known as and informed me that somebody had stolen his automotive. So, I went to the College and we walked throughout in a two-block radius on the lookout for the automotive, however we did not discover it. Two months later, the Chilean police known as me as a result of they discovered the automotive. Once they gave me the tackle, it was three blocks from the College. The automotive had been there for 2 months, parked in the identical place the place Augusto left it. To me, that have was key. To me, that have was key. He by no means stated, “Wow, I left the automotive there.” That was once we determined to go to the physician.
The documentary gives an intimate have a look at the every day expertise caring for somebody with Alzheimer’s illness. What was the expertise of being Augusto’s major caregiver like for you?
In life, there are tough issues and delightful issues. Being a caregiver for somebody is each of these.
There are a variety of compromises and sacrifices if you develop into the first caregiver for the one you love. There are prices — financially, emotionally, bodily — but additionally advantages when confronted with this choice. For me, I knew it was inside me. I assumed all the prices, and I assumed all that was to be found. And, I found some unimaginable issues. I didn’t see myself as solely a “caregiver,” however as an grownup girl who grew to become a “care companion” for somebody I really like.
As you see within the documentary, typically Augusto needed to come to work with me as a result of I needed to proceed to be the one who supported and sustained us. I employed somebody to assist me at choose occasions and since there have been some care wants that required two individuals. The remainder of the time, it was simply me and Augusto. Whereas it had its difficulties, I additionally loved the time it allowed us to spend collectively.
This illness is a person household duty and likewise a social duty. There are various who cannot simply embrace their family members of their work, like I included Augusto. This illness strongly impacts the financial life and the well being of the caregivers. There must be reduction and the required instruments to assist individuals face tough moments.. It’s principally ladies who’re caring for youngsters or assume the duty of carers, and it took ladies a very long time — too lengthy — to be accepted as extra than simply moms, however as individuals who can play a task in politics and society as effectively. Caring is part of our identification, not all of it.
The documentary is a ravishing have a look at your love story and the way love can prevail even in a few of life’s darker moments. How did you and Augusto present your love on Valentine’s Day, and day-after-day?
Essentially the most stunning a part of our story is that we found unconditional love for each other. It exists if you end up weak and precarious, in your dangerous days and your good ones. To have somebody with you in these moments is probably the most unimaginable factor. I felt that with Augusto.
It isn’t solely great to really feel that any person can assist you, however the feeling you get if you assist any person else. You notice that your life has which means. Typically we will stay an enclosed life, residing for ourselves. However, reaching out your hand for another person, can present you a way of life.
What recommendation would you give to others who’re coping with related conditions?
Individuals hear the prognosis and get very afraid and take into consideration the entire difficulties. I’m not saying to not be afraid — but additionally, go discovering. There’s a lot to be taught.
It is very important attempt to steadiness your feelings. This illness requires emotional administration. In case you start to endure, to get offended, to really feel impotent and do not face it, you, too, will find yourself sick. Then again, in case you handle to steadiness the onerous moments with moments of reduction and laughter and take issues with tenderness and affection and dedication, you’ll be able to survive this.
Maybe crucial recommendation is to grasp that this can be a choice and you may at all times change your thoughts. In case you notice that you’re not in a position to cope, be trustworthy with your self and search for another. You need to be trustworthy with your self, and never run away from the issue.
What classes have you ever taken away out of your husband’s battle with Alzheimer’s?
Alzheimer’s is a degenerative illness. There isn’t a remedy. How I confronted this illness is by schooling and acceptance. All of us will undergo tough experiences in our lives and whereas this journey was tough, being there for Augusto and holding his hand by means of it collectively was deeply significant.
Each you and Augusto had careers as storytellers — you as an actress and Augusto as a journalist. Why was it necessary so that you can inform your expertise with Alzheimer’s by means of this documentary?
The choice to take part within the documentary was Augusto’s and it was a aware choice early on in his prognosis. When he disclosed in one of many essential newspapers in Chile that he was identified with Alzheimer’s illness, he was greeted with an incredible response of respect. He grew to become a public determine within the marketing campaign to face Alzheimer’s illness and advocate for higher insurance policies.
Maite Alberdi (director of “The Everlasting Reminiscence”) had a imaginative and prescient to inform our love story within the midst of Augusto’s Alzheimer’s. I couldn’t see how it might come collectively however creators see issues. If you find yourself residing by means of tough issues and are in a position to share them with others, it may be deeply significant.
“The Everlasting Reminiscence” is a ravishing murals. That’s what Maite and Augusto created collectively. I see now that it has remodeled the hearts and minds of individuals. That may be a marvel.
If the movie might help anybody acknowledge that like several problem in life, we will overcome it, that’s what it means to be alive.
All images courtesy of MTV Documentary Movies.
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